Your child aged 4-5 years

Your child is fast becoming more independent as she prepares to go to school. Children of this age can experience nightmares and night terrors. They also may become more fussy eaters as they exert their independence. In this section you will also find information on positive discipline techniques to help ensure your children grow up caring and well behaved.

 

Fussy eaters		Positive Discipline		Sleep issues in young children
Feeling frustrated that all your hard work cooking healthy meals is wasted   on your child, then read on...		Teaching your child the rights and wrongs in the world		Nightmares, Night terrors and Sleep walking

 

 

 

 

At guernseymums we are really pleased that our nutritional expert Helen Sylvester of Pure Nutrition www.pure-nutrition.co.uk  has written us a piece on fussy eaters which is a subject of interest to all parents and carers.  We all know how frustrating it is to cook a healthy meal only for our child to refuse to eat it or for them to eat a banana one day and the next say that they don't like it!! Hopefully the article below will help you uncover some tips to deal with this issue:

Helen writes:

When my daughter was born, I had just started my degree in nutritional therapy and had high hopes of her devouring my home cooked nutritious meals. However as she grew older, her small appetite and refusal to eat certain foods started me on a quest to ensure she ate nutritious foods without meal times turning into a battle.

Below are a few tips I have found helpful over the years as a Nutritional Therapist and also as a mother of a ‘fussy eater’!

1) Some children respond well to reward charts and I like the one available at lemonburst.co.uk (see link below). This chart encourages your child to eat a variety of coloured fruit and vegetables and the whole family can get involved.

www.lemonburst.co.uk/acatalog/Lemonburst_The_Rainbow_Food_Activity_Chart_22.html

2) This tip is probably one that every parent of a fussy child has tried, hiding the ‘good stuff’ in a sauce. When I started weaning I brought a food processor and although it was expensive, I have found it invaluable. Vegetables can be chopped until very fine and added to bolognaise or casseroles and nuts and seeds, which can be blended to almost a powder, can be added to cakes, biscuits, smoothies and bread. I also blend homemade soups so I can include beans and lentils as well as a range of vegetables.

3) Smoothies are a great way to ensure your child gets some fresh fruit. Use a few dessertspoons of natural yoghurt, a small banana, some berries (use frozen berries straight from the freezer if out of season as this also makes the smoothie nice and cool) and add a small amount of honey to sweeten if necessary. Loosen with milk or water and blend until smooth. This is something your child can also help you make.

4) Many children love to bake and I have found that with daughter it is the process she enjoys just as much as eating the cakes at the end. In fact she doesn’t appear to mind if she is baking chocolate fairy cakes or carrot and pineapple muffins, so I will normally choose the healthier option and save chocolate cakes for parties.

5) If your child refuses to eat anything wholemeal it is possible to adjust recipes that use plain flour, using a 50:50 mix of plain and wholemeal flour, which can be more acceptable to them. This works especially well in foods such as cakes, biscuits, pastry and bread. In the recipes I have tried most work well with this ratio, although you may need to play around a bit. It is worth noting that very young children should avoid too much wholemeal wheat flour, as it can be an irritant to their digestive tracts.

6) Try being creative with their favourite foods. My daughter loves pancakes which are quick to prepare and can be made into a healthy breakfast or lunch. When making the mixture I use a 50:50 mix of wholemeal and plain flour and when cooked serve with warm berries or bananas and for a savoury option choose grated hard cheese or a soft cream cheese.

7) To reduce the sugar content of homemade cakes and biscuits I have found reducing the sugar in recipes by 30-50% works well. In addition try using more natural sweeteners such as maple syrup and honey instead of sugar. (Babies under one should not be fed honey)

8) Try making home cooked versions of children’s favourites such as fish fingers. Get some thick white fillets of fish, cut into fingers and coat in seasoned flour, then beaten egg followed by breadcrumbs. Again you can use wholemeal breadcrumbs and I breadcrumb the ends of bread (using a food processor) and keep in the freezer to save time.

9) As my daughter has got older, it has got easier to encourage her to eat a balanced diet as I can explain why it is important. Just like adults children will respond more positively if they understand the reason behind your requests. It is also a good idea not to ‘go on’ about the more unhealthy choices, as my daughter kindly pointed out to me!

10) Some children find being faced with a plate of food much larger than their appetite can put them off, so be realistic about what you expect them to eat. Again as my daughter has grown I have encouraged her to serve her own plate of food (with guidance). So she takes responsibility for her food choices.

Overall it is important to establish a healthy, positive attitude to eating and if you lead by example and eat a balanced healthy diet yourself, this is a positive image for your children.

This article is aimed at those children who are fussy eaters and not for children who have an eating disorder. If your child has poor weight gain, showing signs of nutritional deficiencies or failing to thrive it is important that you seek professional advice.

The recipe below was adapted from a recipe by Delia Smith. I have reduced the sugar content, replaced some of the remaining sugar with maple syrup, adjusted the flour to a 50:50 mix and added extra nuts. The result is a delicious banana and walnut bread, which is probably slightly denser than when using just white flour, but is a real favourite in our house.

Banana and Walnut Loaf

3 oz soft butter
1 oz caster sugar
2 tbsp maple syrup

4 oz plain white flour
4oz plain wholemeal flour
2 levels teaspoons baking powder
4 medium bananas
2oz walnuts roughly chopped.

Method

1. Preheat oven to 180 C / 350 F/ Gas 4.
2. Grease a loaf tin measuring 9 X 19 cm) and line the bottom.
3. Place butter, sugar and beaten egg in a large mixing bowl and sift in the baking powder and both flours. In another bowl peel and mash the bananas.
4. Use an electric mixer to whisk the sugar, eggs, butter and flour, until roughly combined.
5. Add the mashed bananas and chopped walnuts and mix thoroughly.
6. Transfer to the loaf tin and bake in the centre of the oven for 50-55 minutes.
7. Leave to cool in the tin for 10 minutes then turn out onto a baking tray to cool.

Please feel free to contribute to this article by contacting us at info@guernseymums.gg . Or share any advice or experience on this subject by joining the Guernsey Grapevine at http://www.grapevine.guernseymums.gg/ . 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Positive Discipline

Discipline is about educating your child on what is right and wrong in the world. It is something many parents struggle with because we naturally don’t want to upset or disappoint our children. We do however, want to ensure our children grow up caring and well behaved. The following outlines a few ways in which we can encourage good behaviour;

Set a good example – children take their cues from us, they love copying behaviours they see on a daily basis so if they witness kindness, fairness and respectful behaviours at home, they are more likely to take on these standards themselves.

Respect is mutual – just as we want our children to stop and listen to us offer the same courtesy to your child. Acknowledge what your child is feeling, sometimes simply by saying “I understand that you are angry/upset/disappointed”

Be consistent - Once you make a rule, you must stick to it. It is better to pick one chore or rule that must always be obeyed rather than have several which are difficult to enforce. Your child will respect you for being firm and unwavering.

Know your child – Every child has a unique personality and therefore different levels of discipline will be appropriate. Time out may be effective for one child but for another it may worsen behaviour.

Get to the root cause of the behaviour – is your child playing up because you have been busy doing house hold chores and is therefore bored or has there been some major changes in the family recently, a new sibling or moving house?

Recognise that life isn’t always fair – acknowledge that your child may be upset about how she/she was treated perhaps in comparison to a younger sibling or a friend and explain that you appreciate her/her frustration but that life is not always fair.

Disciplining your child is not about punishment but about finding effective solutions to discourage bad behaviour and reinforce good behaviour. The following are a few techniques which may help teach your child the benefits of good behaviour and the consequences of bad behaviour.

Time Out – almost everyone will have heard of this method, otherwise known as the ‘naughty step’. This method can be very effective when you both need a moment to calm down. It gives your child a chance to think about what she has done wrong and how she can make amends. Ask for an apology at the end of time out and discuss with your child why that behaviour is unacceptable, e.g ‘hitting other people hurts and it is never ok’

Sticking to routines – children thrive on set routines and structure to their day. If you have a set bedtime routine then stick to it as much as possible and you may avoid some of those bedtime struggles.

Compromise and distraction – rather than saying ‘No’ all the time, try suggesting a different activity if behaviour is worsening. Getting some fresh air often works wonders!

Preparation – give your child a warning before changing any activity. Warn them that bedtime is approaching or that it is nearly time to go out.

Removing rewards for bad behaviour – this works on the principle that good behaviour will be rewarded but that those same rewards will be removed for bad behaviour.

Sharing experiences and strategies with other parents can be very beneficial and reassuring. Don’t feel alone and remember that most behaviour is only a phase and soon your child will have moved on and be challenging you in other ways! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sleep issues in young children

Nightmares

Most children have nightmares occasionally.  These are vivid and frightening dreams.  Children will usually remember the dream, and will need to be comforted so that they can get back to sleep.  Nightmares can also be caused by worry, by nasty accidents, by bullying and by abuse of any kind.  You can help by encouraging your child to talk about the dream or draw a picture of it.  This will help you to find out the cause of the upset and work out what help or support your child needs.

Night terrors

Night terrors most commonly affect children between the ages of 4 and 12 years. They are completely different from nightmares or anxiety-related dreams.  Unlike nightmares, they happen to young children an hour or two after falling asleep. The first sign is that your child is screaming uncontrollably and seeming to be awake.  In spite of appearances, your child is still asleep.  They will not be able to recognise you, will be confused and unable to communicate, and it is usually hard to reassure them. It is best not to try and wake them, but sit with them until the night terror passes, usually after about 5 minutes. Try not to feel upset yourself.  It can be very distressing to see your child so disturbed, but they will not remember it in the morning. Children usually grow out of this.

Sleepwalking

Sleepwalking is similar to night terrors, but instead of being terrified, the child gets up out of bed and moves around.  The main thing you can do to help is to make sure that they don't hurt themselves.  You may need to take practical precautions, like using a stair-gate, making sure that windows and doors are securely locked, and that fires are screened or put out.  This is also something that children tend to grow out of.

Why sleep problems matter

Sleep problems are very common. Most children's sleep problems happen only occasionally. They are not serious and get better on their own, with time. If they don't, you need to take them seriously. As well as being upsetting, they may interfere with your child's learning and behaviour. There may be an underlying health problem, physical or mental.

 

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